Midnight Truths

Sometimes I just don’t have the energy. Life’s threads tangle up into an unintelligible web. The paradoxes of existence get to my head. I miss people I resent. I want to skip years. I want to freeze time. To simply rest. To create a masterpiece. To explore and to be at home. To adventure in safety. To fly through the mundane. To be understood, but wholly unique. Love without hurt. Change without loss. Truth without ache.

Then there are moments of startling clarity. The rush of gratitude toward my family, who always sticks with me while others change. Sunlight off water. The kind words of a friend. The comfort of my own home, resting in light, listening to rainfall, holding a purring bundle of fur. Moments of contentment that I am who I am and whatever happens, it is well with my soul. 

I’m just so tired.